I suppose it's not a new year yet, although it may be in faraway lands like Australia or Honali. I wanted to wish everyone a safe and prosperous and blessed New Year before two or three weeks had gone by. It's interesting to me that we start the new year by not working (for most people) - does this say something about our work-obsessed culture? Is this a good thing or a bad thing? I've often thought that we should take the last day off, and work the first day. It seems more appropriate somehow.

Posted by Carl at 2:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

Entenmann's has created a single serve original chocolate chip cookie box and they have somehow ended up in the AccuWeather vending machine. A severe sugar rush advisory is in effect for the next 3 hours.

I hope everyone had a great Christmas! As may have been erroneously reported here, I did not receive any toothpaste or soap. But the ginkgo biloba is awesome.

Posted by Carl at 2:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

I know, I know, it's a little early. But I wanted to let everyone know that the Schaad Christmas Letter is up and you can read your own PDF copy here. There's some material taken from the blog, so long-time sharp-minded readers may recognize a bit or two. But the whole Pictionary thing was too good to pass up.

Alert Communicator Tammy roped me into doing the letter 13 years ago, I think, and every year I swear it will be the last because the pressure to be witty and entertaining to family and friends is getting nigh unbearable*. But something happens, I think some sort of Jedi Mind Trick, and I end up doing it anyway. Oh well. I hope you enjoy the peek into our twisted family.

I'll likely post again before Christmas, but in case you are not able to get a chance to visit the blog (shame on you!) a very Merry Christmas to you and yours.

*Today's asterisk delayed and subsequently sponsored by LEGO. Buy LEGOs today even IF I don't see a dime of it. The whole point here was just to use the word nigh, which is sort of a holiday thing. (I get lots of nigh in my stocking each year, along with soap and whatnot.)

Posted by Carl at 10:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBacks (0)

In light of this post

Posted by Carl at 1:26 AM | Permalink | TrackBacks (0)

And we must take a stand.

Posted by Carl at 12:46 AM | Permalink | TrackBacks (0)

The title of this post is, of course, a reference to Alert Shopper Tammy's rumored habit of buying toothpaste and putting it in stockings. Of course, I would never suggest such a thing because I have no proof.

Yesterday was Wednesday and I woke up with horrible ear pain. That is, a pain that was horrible and located in my ear. I thought I must have an ear infection, and so called and made an appointment with my doctor. Not only did I have some sort of ear infection but I had a bonus sinus infection. That is, a pain that was located in my sinuses. You can't appreciate a sinus infection until you visit the doctor and he presses right on your sinuses and holds there until you start to cry like a little girl.

Now I have a super antibiotic which hunts down and kills your typical biotic. Assuming I have typical biotics I should be feeling better by Christmas. The super antibiotic has the side effect of "unusual or unpleasant taste in your mouth" which I can confirm. It's like you've eating aluminum shavings or something. Not that I do that regularly.

The Christmas shopping is almost complete. The kids will be thrilled with their iPod Touchs, digital cameras, Nintendo DSs, and new Hummers. (The kids sometimes read the blog so I have to plant disinformation.) I'm not a very good shopper. On the one hand, I don't want to buy anything that is practical, because there's always time later to buy toothpaste and soap. On the other hand, I don't want to buy anything superfluous because there are very few things that a child will actually play with beyond December. So I go out and look for something cool and practical but not too practical that will captivate the gift receiver and be used for more than a few weeks. I think there's only one thing that fits that description, and that's money but money doesn't make for an exciting Christmas morning.

I will say that as we get closer to Christmas some sort of brain damage ensues - or perhaps temporary insanity - and almost everything looks like a good gift. I was as Barnes and Noble tonight and was browsing books and saw something on the sale shelf about the Civil War and thought, "The kids might enjoy that." Or when I was in a checkout lane at another store and was looking over all of the garbage they put there and thought, "Hm, that Visine looks good. Oh, a lint roller. And look, lighters!"

Sigh. Brain damage.

Posted by Carl at 11:14 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

This isn't just about Facebook but about social networking in general. I find that you have to put a lot of energy into social networking to really, really be networking socially. And since I'm an introvert and people-adverse I find it difficult to network, socially, virtually, real-life or whatever. That may come as a surprise to some of you - and if so you need to mail me some chocolate as penance.

The other issue with social networking is that it's a great way to tell everyone that you don't have any friends. Actually, that you don't even have any virtual friends. To me that seems pretty pathetic, but I tend to come from a perfectionistic point of view and even if I don't like being social I still would rather see my friends count break 20.

So I thought I would run an experiment. If anyone out there has Facebook feel free to add me as a "friend." No requirements, expectations or fees are required. You don't need to send me chocolate, real or virtual. You DO need a Facebook account, but I'm pretty sure I'm the last person on earth to get one so that may not be a problem.

The link to my page can be found here:

Link to my page

At least, I hope I'm doing that right. If I'm not let me know and I'll try to figure it out.

Thanks, Friend!

Posted by Carl at 11:27 AM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

Let's hope not.

(Thanks to Alert Reader Wade for the tip!)

Posted by Carl at 11:23 AM | Permalink | TrackBacks (0)

Thanks to everyone (both of you) who left a comment about Christmas stockings. You can see the list here, including an interesting post about giving kids suitcases for Christmas and leading them to believe that was all they got, while the rest of the presents were inside. Classic.

Feel free to leave a comment If you're still inclined to help my research grant. I'd also like suggestions for things to put in stockings, as we're a bit stumped for our son and daughter. I keep coming up with things like iPods, cellphones, Gameboys, gold doubloons, and other things that are small that I would like to get if I was a child. Alert Shopper Tammy, on the other hand, comes up with things like toothpaste and soap and other more practical items.

I have one other holiday item to report, as I sit in our house with the sleet chipping away at the windows, and this is a very sad and disturbing story. Apparently, Rudolph has sold out to the man.

In order to understand how I feel about this, you need to know that I come from the generation that only saw Christmas shows once a year, when they ran on network TV. Back then (he says fondly, while grimacing from the rheumatism) these shows were special because they only appeared briefly, and weren't available the rest of the year on cable, DVD or YouTube. The family would gather around the TV set and tune in that special night.

So imagine my horror when I saw Rudolph selling insurance. I suppose this is a brilliant move on Aflac's part, but when I saw all of the characters from the old cartoon I was stunned. At first I thought it was some sort of parody, but it's the real thing. I suppose it was inevitable, and next year Cindy Lou Who will be hawking home security.

What do you think? Horrible exploitation or brilliant reminiscence?

Posted by Carl at 11:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

I've been watching the current snow storm forecasts very carefully, mostly because my nemesis at AccuWeather initially forecasted 1-2' for State College. So there was some excitement at the Schaad house (Cassie and Carl) some dread (Tammy) and some jaded bitterness (Connor). While Henry was very optimistic, AccuWeather.com was somewhat less so only forecasting 12.5". Still, a foot of snow is a foot of snow.

Since then the forecast has dwindled and dwindled and even Henry has backed down on his snowfall prediction. Forecasting is an interesting science, because the line between considered reevaluation and just being incorrect is blurred. For example, if someone says there will be a huge snowstorm in the northeast 10 days out, and there is but your area gets squat, is that a victory? If you say 9 days out it will snow two feet but then 2 days out you say it will rain, were you right if it rains?

Now that the snow is all but an impossibility for State College and a rock is almost certain everyone's turning their attention to the possible ice. Here the NWS and AccuWeather.com disagree. As of 10:34pm, AccuWeather.com is saying:

The NWS on the other hand is saying the following:

Note that they're predicting a high Sunday of "mid and upper 30s". AccuWeather.com lists a high of 30°.

This isn't your run-of-the-mill sunny/partly cloudy discrepancy. If you are trying to plan any traveling tomorrow these two forecasts diverge dramatically. Upper 30s and rain is not anywhere close to 30° and ice.

So we'll see. AccuWeather is particularly strong when they're forecasting in their own back yard. They know the terrain, the idiosyncrasies of State College weather and, best of all, they have Henry.

Posted by Carl at 10:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

Alert Reader Nick alerted me to this awesome Christmas gift/stocking stuffer. Presenting, the LEGO® Ice Brick Tray:

I didn't think there was anything in the world that could make a Pepsi® even more exciting - but there you have it. I may have to order some or leave tips for the family somewhere. At $8 it's a pretty reasonable gift, particularly for the LEGO® lover in your family.

And finally, some questions about stockings: Do you "do" stockings, and if so - two important follow-up questions. Should the gifts in a stocking be wrapped, and when do you open the stockings? I'm trying to get a government grant for this study, so your involvement is appreciated!

Posted by Carl at 9:41 AM | Permalink | Comments (22) | TrackBacks (0)

Note: Today's post includes what some might term spoilers for a particular Disney dining experience at the Whispering Canyon. Read at your own risk..."

Monday was Day 8 and by Schaad Standards it was a big day as it featured a major run-in with the Law.

Today we spent the first part of the day at Disney Studios. We're a pretty slow family and so only visited a few shows, but it was nice to take our time and wander about. We're Schaads, and so love shopping and DS has some of the best shops at Disney World. I went all out and bought a new keychain. Connor surprised me with a Mickey Mouse "Best Father" statuette in the style of an Oscar. I'm not sure who my competition was but I'm sure they were terribly crushed.

While at DS we visited the Chronicles of Narnia show. It was cute, and the cast member playing the White Witch really resembled Tilda Swinton. There was a brief mention of Prince Caspian coming out in May of 2008, and it sounds great. They showed some concept artwork that looked very promising.

We later took in the Lights, Motor, Action show which was exciting but seemed to end two-thirds of the way through. The ending was very abrupt, too, with the audience looking around as if to say, "Do we leave now?" My theory, which I didn't get an opportunity to ask a cast member about, was that there was some technical problem that caused the early ending. Normally the car makes a jump through flames at the end, but that was missing entirely.

After spending the day at DS we went to a restaurant called the "Whispering Canyon." We read really good reviews on the Internet (foreshadowing) and also learned on the Internet (foreshadowing) that when you asked the wait staff certain questions they would respond in comical ways. And so, armed with specific questions we found on the Internet (foreshadowing) we went to the restaurant, completely unprepared.

The meal was buffet style and the food was great. The theming was Old West and our server was Se˜nor Dusty Trails (I kid you not.) Cassie asked the first question: "Do you have any ketchup?" Of course, she didn't need ketchup but this was her question and she was going to ask it. Se˜nor Trails responded, "You askin' for ketchup?" She nodded, and Dusty proceeded to yell at the top of his lungs, "KETCHUP! SHE DON'T NEED NO KETCHUP BUT'S ASKIN' ANYWAY! KEEEEEEEETTTTTTTCHUUUUUUP!" With that, kids from around the restaurant started to bring ketchup to our table. In a matter of seconds we had 12 bottles.

We did our best to continue eating at our now crowded table, when Cassie asked another question: "Where's your six-shooter?" Dusty mumbled something about kids having their toys taken away. We weren't sure what that meant.

Finally we were getting close to finishing when Tammy asked Se˜nor Trails: "Where can I buy some chewing gum?" Of course, you can't get chewing gum at DIsney for obvious reasons. At first Dusty responded, "You got fifty bucks? I'll tell you." Then he paused and looked at Tammy and said "Someone's been readin' the Internet. Well I tell you what, I'm the LAW here and I'm gonna be right back." With that he walked across the dining area and disappeared in a back room. At this point Alert Internet Reader Tammy started to look a little worried. When Dusty re-emerged, he had a microphone and a stick pony. Tammy then turned snow white (sorry) and I just started laughing.

Se˜nor Trails then stopped at our table and announced to the whole dining area, "Listen Up! We got a lady here reads too much of the Internet. So she's gonna ride this pony around the dining room." Our table was laughing - all except for Alert Pony Rider Tammy, who knew she was done for. "What happens if I don't ride the stick pony?" she asked. "Then I make you ride the pony around the lobby first, and THEN the dining room." She took the pony. I snapped a photo which may or may not ever be seen on the blog. With everyone cheering she began her loop, with Dusty explaining that she had to ride the stick pony with these exaggerated, up-and-down leg movements. It was glorious. The kids, who initially were unsure of our dining choice, were completely sold. There's no doubt that this would be the most memorable moment/stick pony ride of the entire trip.

Posted by Carl at 11:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

A stumbled across a trailer for Prince Caspian a few days ago. Here's the link at Yahoo! Movies where you can view it or download the monster HD version. It looks great, I can't wait.

Posted by Carl at 10:28 AM | Permalink | TrackBacks (0)

There's really not much I can add to this, so I'm going to quote this article at PhotoshopSupport.com:

I bet you didn't know a Pantone color could satisfy the need for reassurance in a complex world, didn't you? Now you do. Go out and buy a extra large jar of Pantone 18-3943 Blue Iris today. You won't be sorry.

Here's Blue Iris, in case you would have trouble picking it out from a line-up:

Posted by Carl at 9:57 AM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

One of the reasons that my vacation posts are lagging, as it were, is because I've been working on my book which is tentatively titled "29 Disney Tips And Mistakes I Made So You Don't Have To." I say tentatively because that title doesn't have chocolate in it, and I'm not sure I'll end up with 29 tips and/or mistakes. I suppose that part is easy to change if I end up with 30, 31 or 5.

The last four days of our trip at Disney were Sunday-Wednesday. Wednesday was our last day before leaving Orlando for Sanford, FL where we visited family, and then on to Savannah, GA. Thursday we traveled from Savannah, GA to Richmond, VA and then Friday we drove (skated) back to State College. Upon return to Pennsylvania Alert Winter Hater Tammy promptly developed a nasty cold. I have a minor cold, which could easily be beat up by Tammy's cold.

Space Mountain photo via Flickr.

But, with that ride we covered the "Big 3" mountains: Space, Big Thunder and Splash. Quite a feat for the excitement-impaired Schaads.

We also rode Peter Pan's Flight, which I think needs a little overhauling. I would add some explosions, some lasers - maybe a werewolf or something. The whole rde strikes me as a little dated. I keep wondering why Disney hasn't made Peter Pan 2: Revenge of the Monsterous Blood-Thirsty Fire-Breathing Alligator King. I think there's box office gold there (not to mention a whole line of Monsterous Blood-Thirsty Fire-Breathing Alligator King plushies, and pillow covers, and small shot glasses, as well as a new theme park ride.)

The second half of our day was spent at Downtown Disney. When we first started planning our trip to Disney I decided that I would get a sundae at Ghirardelli's. Every time we visited Disney in the past I would always say that I was going to get a sundae and then inevitably back out when I saw the line. I love their chocolate - well, I love almost everyone's chocolate - and a sundae just sounded perfect. This year I finally got my sundae and while I can't say that it was worth the eight year wait it was pretty darn good. Later in the evening we had dinner at Puck Express, which was some of the best food we've had on the vacation.

The shopping at Downtown Disney is great. We visited the Art of Disney which is one of those stores in which you threaten your kids with all sorts of pain if they touch anything. Cassie made the rounds with her autograph book and had a really sweet cast member named Nicola sign it. Nicola suggested that Cassie ask the artist on hand, Eddie, to sign the book as well as he might draw her a picture. The artists that work at the Art of Disney draw sketches for a fee. When Nicola saw Cassie hovering around Eddie without asking for an autograph, she stepped in and asked the artist for her. It was one of those classic Disney moments. I later visited guest relations and filled out a "Guest Service Fanatic" card which is then sent to the cast member and is put in their employee record. (I think receiving a certain number of these results in a special award to the cast member.)

More tomorrow...

Posted by Carl at 10:41 PM | Permalink | TrackBacks (0)

Yesterday was the annual Schaad Fir Slaughter. This event occurs about once a year, usually after Thanksgiving when the Pennsylvania Fir Season begins. Although there's no limit on the number of firs a Pennsylvanian can bag the Schaads typically only take one.

Now, you might ask "What in the world are you doing hunting firs when I don't even know how the vacation ended, what happened when Alert Restauranteur Tammy ran afoul the law, and what the Schaads found when they arrived home?" Go ahead, I'll wait. Ask away.

Okay, thanks for asking. It seems that sometimes a blogger has nothing to write about, and sometimes there is too much to write about. What? Yes, I suppose I completely made that up and am just whining. In any event, I wanted to make sure that you knew what the results of the annual fir hunt were, because I'm likely to forget all about it until December 31.

This year's hunt occurred in the same place as the last 16 - Tait Farm. You can click on that link to see the firs waiting to be hunted. Go ahead, I'll wait.

Unfortunately a combination of precipitation and hundreds of hunters walking to and fro the field created something called mud. Not only that, but said mud was about 1" deep. The best firs - the Douglas Fir, which is pleasantly full and has a nice scent - we're located in the farthest reaches of the tree farm. It was a three mile walk as the crow flies, or a five mile walk as the Carl walks. Uphill. While dragging the tree carcass cart behind me.

I immediately hunted down a suitable tree that met all of Alert Christmas Decorator Tammy's needs: "Get a tree." It was almost pleasantly full, about 6' tall and cowered before my extremely dull saw blade. The kids weren't entirely sold, and proceeded to run off farther into the trees. I yelled after them that the sun would set soon, and that we would then be at the mercy of the trees and no one would hear us scream this far out, but they mostly ignored me. Eventually they came back with news that they found the perfect tree - up ahead, in a glade bathed in moonlight surrounded by tame woodland creatures. I followed them and yes, it was all true - and the tree was 30 feet tall. I explained that my cart would get stuck in the mud under all of that weight, and that cutting down 30 foot tall firs was dangerous because they liked to fall on you out of spite. So we returned back to the original almost plump tree and after saying a prayer of thanksgiving for this timely bounty I used the saw and sliced through the trunk like a knife through soft butter.*

Soundly defeated, the tree fell over and stopped moving. I hefted it on to the cart with one hand and jogged back to the front of the farm where I had to pay something like 20 dollars per fir tree foot. While I was paying the kindly farm folk tied up my tree so that it wouldn't try anything on the ride home. I threw it in the trunk and then returned home triumphant.

Sadly there were no clamoring throngs at my house to greet me, and the tree did end up getting the best of me when it somehow swelled up at the bottom and would not fit in my tree stand. I am completely, totally, 100% ready to go artificial next year. I'm thinking of something in the 3-4' range. Which would only cost 30 dollars per fir tree foot.

*It's entirely possible that this part is slightly exaggerated.

Posted by Carl at 9:39 PM | Permalink | TrackBacks (0)

I wanted to leave a quick post in case anyone had been reading closely and figured out that we were in Richmond, Virginia today and planning to leave for home early in the morning. (I have no misconceptions that this actually happened, but I like to cover my bases.)

As we left Richmond we saw the most bizarre scene I have ever seen on a road. We took I-64 west from Richmond to I-81 and after about 30 minutes on the road we passed an accident scene. Two cars were parked on the side of the road and had obviously been in a collision. No one was present so we assumed this happened some time ago. But as we continued west we passed accident after accident. We saw cars flipped over, a car with the rear completely smashed in a near perfect circle like it had struck a large tree trunk at high speed, and the back of a Fed-Ex truck shredded. Eventually traffic on I-64 stopped, and then moved very slowly over a period of almost an hour. We finally came to the source of the delay: a car wedged under some sort of tanker. We passed more cars by the side of road, including an accident scene with someone being attended on a stretcher.

We speculated at the time that there must have been ice earlier in the morning, although the way the accidents were spaced apart was very odd. It wasn't until we arrived home at State College that we did find out that the cause was ice. Not only that, but there were apparently "hundreds of accidents" in central Virginia and over 200 in and around Richmond, with two traffic fatalities. We were all quite spooked and very grateful we left as late as we did (around 8:30 a.m.) I just had to get a bagel at Einstein Bros. Bagels - and you have to wonder if that bagel was the difference between being in an accident and avoiding one. I suppose you can crazy thinking about those sorts of things.

I should have a complete vacation wrap-up tomorrow, including what we found at our house when we arrived home. (Alert Home Owner Tammy was definitely shocked.)

Posted by Carl at 10:16 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

Just a quick note to say that the grammar-challenged, typo-riddled, spelling erorr enhanced post vacation wrap up will be done...soon. Find out what happens when Alert Internet Reader Tammy runs afoul the law, who "Eddie" is and what he wrote in the autograph book, and what the Schaad's last few hours at Disney looked like. (Was shopping involved?)

Posted by Carl at 9:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

The weather was beautiful - almost too hot - and while the crowds were heavy in the morning it became more manageable as the day wore on. On the way out of AK Cassie asked a cast member named "Gus" for his autograph and he was so touched that he said she was a "special person" and gave her two special "Magic Moments" pins.

Nice fireworks photo that you can actually recognize as fireworks.

Now armed with a FastPass, the rest of the family determined we were doomed to ride the Tower of Terror and so gave it. While I thought it was a great ride, and exceptionally themed, the reactions of the other Schaads varied between nausea and, well, terror. Who felt what will be a closely guarded secret that can be emailed to you as a PDF file for only $9.99. But act now, and I'll throw in another PDF file - "Foods Schaads Won't Eat and Who Won't Eat Them" free of charge.

As exhilarating as the Tower of Terror was, it wasn't the highlight of the evening. We were walking through the Beverly Sunset candy store when Cassie spotted an older cast member standing alone. She asked her to sign the autograph book, and the woman (Annette is her name) wrote the nicest message: "To Cassie, What a sweet young lady!" With that she handed the book back and told Cassie "You made me feel like Princess; thank you." It was one of those moments that convinces you that the whole thing isn't a waste of time.

I had promised Cassie that I would be willing -if she was interested - in buying her another autograph book should she fill this one up, and she did as we left the park. So we picked that up and she already has two (the tram operators that drive guests back to the parking lots that they parked in - several miles away.

I'm sure there's lots more, but I'll save it for my first meet and great, 37below Hero signs his book or more likely other books that are not his but instead were written by people who have apparently published. Either or. Or if the meet and greet thing doesn't work, I could write a real book, It would have pretend, exaggerated stuff in it, but I think that's okay.

If anyone is interested in a get together send me your location, and I can start plotting them on a map and see what's possible.

It's tiring writing these posts after having my brain pureed by the sun, the prices and the people at the parks. So my apologies if they're not up to my usual unattainable level as I'm just costing on fumes here. But this will be a great help when Alert Scrapbooker Tammy wants to begin working on the next, inevitable, scrapbook.

It's a coin toss tomorrow between MK and MGM. MK has the Mickey Christmas Party at night, so it will be crowded. MGM has the extra magic hours for park guests, so it will be crowded. There's no way to know how it will break, so my plan is to do what any guy would do: totally wing it and end up a tired, cranky family. Hm. I suppose I should put a little more thought into a plan that that.

We ended the night at with Fantasmic. All of the guides say to arrive 90 minutes early to get a good seat, but after sitting there for an hour they told us to "move to the left" to make room for people just arriving. We like to do what we're told (we're compliant that way) but it was annoying to give up our seats for people who were arriving in the last ten minutes. The show was amazing though, and not at all what we expected. I took dozens of photos that did not come out at all. Above is one of the fireworks shots that actually looked sort of like fireworks.

Posted by Carl at 10:04 PM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBacks (0)

Alert Reader Chris pointed out that yesterday's post had an asterisk with no accompanying comment, and that this quite disturbing. The ironic thing is that we were driving to Animal Kingdom this morning and the asterisk thing popped into my head. I thought, "DId I ever explain that asterisk?" It was late yesterday, and I was a bit fatigued. So in the interest of helping everyone get to sleep, here's what I intended to post:

Now, this morning as we drove to Animal Kingdom something else popped in there about my post yesterday, which at the time I thought was quite important but it's completely gone now. Actually it's still in the "Soarin'" queue waiting to get on the ride, and so will probably never be seen again. But, if you see something weird about yesterday's post that was it and I'm sorry.

Posted by Carl at 9:55 PM | Permalink | TrackBacks (0)